Measuring the Unmeasurable: How to Assess Disruptive Behavior in Your Workplace

/
Measuring the Unmeasurable: How to Assess Disruptive Behavior in Your Workplace

When it comes to human behavior (especially predicting and managing it), professionals in the field talk about "measuring the unmeasurable."

Most leadership assessments I've seen are based on important skills such as executing strategy, hiring, retention, succession, team and change management. However, when the rubber meets the road, it's an individual's personal characteristics and style that can make or break their success as a leader.

My work with teams and leaders has convinced me that it's a worthy effort to assess individual styles and behaviors and their impact on achieving outcomes. The cost to a leadership team that ignores—or accepts—abrasive behaviors is high.

Read More

How to Have Difficult Conversations (Rudeness and Lies): Part 2

/
How to Have Difficult Conversations (Rudeness and Lies): Part 2

“'Honesty' in social life is often used as a cover for rudeness. But there is quite a difference between being candid in what you're talking about, and people voicing their insulting opinions under the name of honesty,” said Judith Martin aka Miss Manners in 2011. The First Lady of Etiquette was being interviewed about her years as a journalist.

Her nugget of wisdom still feels relevant today – maybe more so in an era of social-media bashing and bullying.

This has me thinking about honesty’s place in the work environment, so here are some thoughts in the second in our series of spotlighting difficult conversations— the kind that raise hackles, taint relationships and spark unproductive conflict—and how to address them.

Read More

How to Have Difficult Conversations (When You Know You're Right): Part 1

/
How to Have Difficult Conversations (When You Know You're Right): Part 1

“They may forget what you said—but they will never forget how you made them feel." Carl Buechner had the right idea in 1971, you’ve since heard variations: It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it!

In the heat of a workplace disagreement or tough conversation (or person) that hooks us emotionally—these are the moments we need to remember these words most. But it’s exactly when we forget them. Our emotions get the better of us and we say things we don’t mean or, worse, that we regret later. The destruction that follows is swift and sometimes really difficult to repair.

Workplace relationships can be tricky, because while most people say “I truly want your honest feedback” they aren’t actually telling the truth. Even stickier is how we feel about telling someone higher up the command chain when they’re wrong.

Read More

Workplace Conflict: The Costs of an Abrasive Leader

/
Workplace Conflict: The Costs of an Abrasive Leader

If the ingredients of a successful workplace team include trust, open communication, support, respect, cohesiveness, healthy conflict, and fun … what happens when an abrasive leader or “bully boss” is tossed into the mix?

You got it - a recipe for disaster for the whole organization!  If that leader’s behavior were to change, would the organization be more successful? The answer is a resounding yes. But how to address what is surely a sticky situation when a power position is in question?


Read More

Dealing with Difficult Behavior

/
Dealing with Difficult Behavior

Conflict is inevitable in the workplace. However, that does not mean that we cannot work to prevent unproductive behavior that leads to conflict. Difficult behavior is a good example of an area where a difference can be made. Although it is easy to label people as difficult, the real focus should always be on the actual behavior. Dealing effectively with difficult behavior is a skill that can nip conflict in the bud.

Difficult behavior is essentially that which inhibits the performance of others. Left alone it will get worse, affect more people and continue to incur hidden costs for the organization in which it occurs. Most difficult behavior is accidental, but it can also be the result of intentional thought. Sometimes it is sporadic and takes us by surprise. At other times it is ongoing and forms patterns.

Read More