Solving the Abrasive Leader Dilemma – keep’em or let’em go?
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In a recent HR meeting, I asked the legal team this question: “As an HR professional in an organization, what should you do if you discover that you have an abrasive leader (a bully) working in your company?”
In less than the time it took me to sit down from asking the question, all four HR attorneys agreed with each other that the answer was simple: “The person needs to be terminated immediately or as soon as you can line up the paper trail so you can fire them without repercussions.”
That was a pretty straightforward response as these sorts of panel discussions go – and brought into stark clarity for me the paralyzing dilemma that an abrasive leader can present to an organization.
In the last seventeen projects I have seen that have involved abrasive leaders, every one of them has had these common elements:
A leader that has been diagnosed as abrasive with all the associated costs, sometimes including threats of harassment lawsuits.
A leader that is one of, if not the most, valuable assets to the organization. That value often includes the difficult-to-measure variable of the very positive relationships the abrasive leader holds with internal and external stakeholders.
HR and management teams that oftentimes deeply care about the leader, and have made attempts to change the behavior – and have failed, and may try again, probably.
Meanwhile, what’s also true is the abrasive leader’s behavior has been harmful enough to cause these problems and more:
Attempts by employees to transfer out of the leader’s area or avoid being transferred in.
Attrition of valued employees from the leader’s area.
Decreased morale and motivation in the leader’s area.
Potential or actual harassment or hostile environment litigation
Excessive managerial time devoted to addressing employee distress.
So, the calculation that is being run by HR and management looks something like the graphic above.
My question – perhaps challenge – to using this equation as a go-to solution is this: “How can we keep this valuable person, remove all the costs associated with the abrasive behavior, and be assured that the perceived abrasive behaviors will not come back?”
There is only one answer to this question in most cases, and that is to not terminate the leader who is perceived to be abrasive. The answer involves a single targeted behavior change effort that works.
Eight years ago, I learned about a process that changes this calculation and clears away the dilemma. The Boss Whispering® coaching process eliminates the costs associated with abrasive leadership, increases the value the abrasive leader brings to the organization, and turns the failed change efforts into a single successful process. As a certified coach, I see great results over and over again, without terminating the leader in question or continuing to suffer the costs of a dysfunctional and unproductive workplace.
Let’s end your abrasive leader dilemma:
Set up an appointment to talk about Boss Whispering: https://www.resologics.com/contact.
Diagnose the leader right now, confidentially. no cost, no obligation, by downloading the Abrasive Leader Diagnostic™.
When we join a company, partnership or team, our expectation is that everyone involved will exhibit professional behavior toward us and each other. Instead, it’s highly possible that we may become one of the more than 60 million adults in the United States who are affected in some way by bullying behavior at work.
What kind of behaviors are we talking about? Our definition is any interpersonal behavior that causes emotional distress in others sufficient enough to impede their productivity or disrupt organizational functioning. It isn’t just a personality conflict — it’s a chronic pattern of disrespectful behavior.